well, here i am.

Krabi in 2 hours time. and i really shouldn't be sleeping coz quoteunquote colin chong "you'll be grumpy when you wake up"

so yes, i decided to pamper myself by blogsurfing, msn-ing with owls and uploading pictures onto friendster.

what a nightlife.sg moment.

***


i haven't really be recapitulating what went on
this whole week
. it's really been a rollercoaster of emotions, from climaxes of camwhoring (thanks van), to confessions to my leader, to renewal of mindsets, schizophrenic decisions and ketching up of loved ones (yes van you again), as well as closer bondings to people i've known for 7 months (mr justin chong zhi da) and linking of friends (MAVIS and *****)
[name withheld in case.. haha]

results have been explained in the earlier post. i guess everyone's pretty much shaken up by the difficulty of admission to local uni. but fer me, i'm just doing what i can, canning what i do, and sitting on the can. let God deal with the rest yo.



i reaally wanna walk in His footsteps.. but there are some things that need to be released and some thats need to be fastended. I'm really going through such turbulent-like times that sometimes when i'm walking with a big group of people.. i just shutup .. walk auto-pilot, and just stare into space, oblivious to on-coming cars and stares.

*

as this blog is monitored by a few friends (whom i've spent a LOT of time with for the past 10 months of so). some feelings and musings should best be left kept within my own mind. the privacy really is an important issue. and such topics without supervision nor privacy would lead to a bombardment of unnecessary questions and inquisitions.

anyone that sincerely gives a damn about me (and not just becoz you're a blawdy nosey-parker), take the risk and ask me whats going on that's really slowly eating me inside out.

*

oh yeah, a bit belated, but congraulations to Sis. Yah Lan for giving birth to a baby girl! :)

&

happy birthday to 5th aunt! here we are, surprising her at 11pm at her house on friday night.

*

I'm not exactly excited for Krabi, 5 days and 4 nights with The Matriach (read: MUM) is a bit overbearing. i could vaguely recall the taiwan and hongkong days spent with her. making me face beet-coloured embarrasment due to UNNECCESSARY bargaining to ridiculous prices in front of a whole flea market.

but still, she has shown unconditional love to me, and has faced torrents of insults and abuse hurlings.. i <3>

but the crux of the matter. I LOVE YOU MUM! :)

* i guess life's really gonna throw you all this bunch of crap and you just have to deal with it.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 2:07 AM 」

MODULE CREDIT

GPA 2.8167
3D COMPUTER ANIMATION
D+
DRAMA PRODUCTION
B+
FILM HISTORY
C+
INTERCULTURAL COMMUNICATION
A
NON-FICTION PRODUCTION
B
SELF DISCOVERY IN POPULAR CULTURE
B+
SHORT FILM & VIDEO SCRIPTWRITING
C+
STUDIO PRODUCTION
B

a bit mixed o'er the results.

i am HAPPY because...
i finally got my first A! (shaddddddddddup to the rest of you nerds. hahaha) even though it's intercultural and it's credit unit is only a miserable 2, i thank GOD for Brina to push me to do well. :)

i am also HAPPY because...
i gotten 2 B+s which goes to show that there is hope in putting in effort if you want to (mega kudos to PinWheel productions and esp leslie, <3!)

i am CONFUSED because...
why is my film history a C+?! i think my exam wasn't THAT bad, and my presentation was kinda above average (eatcha heart out luis benuel *slits eyeball*). does she not like me?! ):

i am PISSED because...
i could have done WAY better in scriptwriting. i really feel like slapping myself in doing that stupid MRT script (classmates ya should know. ngehh)

i am BLESSED because...
studio production. which as a 5 credit unit i got a B! even though our interview was damn boring. and our demo was a bit of a mess (host crawling up the seat like an orangutan! *coughmaviscoughcough*). i'm still happy i got a B. much more presentable than FILM HISTORY. NGEHHH. still upset over it.

overall feelings.
eh. dunno leh. i know that 3DCOMA deserves a D+ (thanks norman for being ever so gracious).

Drama production could have been an A (prease, cinematography was damn good lar)

Film History a B+ (c'mon lar! LUIS BENUEL PRESENTATION LAR)

Intercultural Communication AD (HAHA. so sue me)

Non Fiction Production B (no changes fer this)

Pop Culture A (c'mon, we did a studio recording lar!)

Scriptwriting B (not a B+, coz i know my final script is camel crap)

Studio Production B+ (i was producer and CG lar .. both involving preproduction ya know)

and my GPA decreased by 0.8 ): can't blame it though. i only had like just 5 modules last sem? and thanks to animation to pull it WAYYYY down. oh well.

oh well, thank you Father for these results. i'm sure this will serve as a lesson! :) not to take life lightly and live each day to the best.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 10:32 AM 」

i'm sorry. i have failed. i need time alone.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 12:16 AM 」

"btw tim, its the little things you do that touches our hearts (: thanks tlmonster! don deny xD haha"
- mes (melissa) e374

"i talked to tim for quite a while jus now :) haha thanks tim..the simple things u do can really make my day..thanks alot :)" - jEnn (jenn) e374

you know, sometimes, a little goes a long way :)

to my lovely sisters in Christ, mEs & jEnn :

i've seen you guys from the first week you came to chc for service.

mes, you were an awfully quiet girl who often observed your surroundings, but i pretty much knew that YOU know that this IS the real deal. our God is an AWESOME GOD. YOU knew that this was your calling and this was the place to be.

right now, you're learning the ropes of being the upcoming art creative director under the tutelage of our talented cheryl. i'm glad you've taken this role without complaints. You're on your way to being a powerful woman of Christ! :)

it's always a joy to see you during cellgroup, coz i feel that it's not as crowded as service and our whole cellgroup/family will be able to interact with each other. :) i pray that God will make time for you to take a step deeper into knowing Him more.

"Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory He will reveal to us later" - Romans 8 :18 (NLT)

---

jenn, you were here after mes came in, you often kept to yourself, being rather shy(?)and nonchalant. but after just a week or so, you started being an evangelist by inviting your brothers in. i was like, "wow, our God is amazing. He's just so amazing to invoke a sense of DESIRE to see OTHER people commit their lives to our saviour"

Though they may not be so receptive to God, but i believe that in time to come, the seeds that YOU have sown in them will blossom to bear AWESOME fruits. you're my fellow scholar and you've always been more than willing to help me collect the study hours from the JC/Secsch Student (read: MELVIN)

continue doing good, as Galatians 6 : 9 says (NLT) "so let us not get tired of doing what is GOOD. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up"

i will pray for your circumstances, i know our God is above ALL things. Don't worry. we'll play CS soon too! hehe.

girls, keep shining for Jesus in RJC :) i believe you will do tremendous deeds in time to come
---

on a different note : orchard road seems to be less crowded.. maybe it's coz of the post holiday blues. hahaha. oh well.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 10:43 PM 」

Emergency Bible Phone Numbers

When in sorrow call John 14

When men fail you call Psalm 27

If you want to be fruitful call John 15

When you have sinned call Psalm 51

When you worry call Matthew 6:19-34

When you are in danger call Psalm 91

When God seems far away call Psalm 139

When your faith needs stirring call Hebrews 11

When you are lonely and fearful call Psalm 23

When you grow bittern and critical call I Corinthians 13

For Paul's secret to happiness call Colossians 3:12-17

For understanding Christianity call II Corinthians 5:15-19

When you feel down and out call Romans 8:31

When you want peace and rest call Matthew 11:25-30

When the world seems bigger than God call Psalm 90

When you want Christian assurance call Romans 8:1-30

When you leave home for labor or travel call Psalm 121

When your prayers grow narrow or selfish call Psalm 67

For a great invention/ opportunity call Isaiah 55

When you want courage for a task call Joshua 1

For how to get along with fellow men call Romans 12

When you think of investments & returns call Mark 10

If you are depressed call Psalm 27

If your pocketbook is empty call Psalm 37

If you are losing confidence in people call I Corinthians 13

If people seem unkind call John 15

If discouraged about your work call Psalm 126

If you find the world growing small and yourself great call Psalm 19

For dealing with fear call Psalm 34:7

For security call Psalm 121:3For assurance call Mark 8:35

For reassurance call Psalm 145:18

Emergency numbers may be dialed direct. No operator assistance necessary. All lines are open to Heaven 24 hours a day! Feed your faith, and doubt will starve to death!

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 1:12 PM 」

apparently, i'm desperately seeking a job. church building fund is coming up, as well as budget for specialist (which isn't a small sum btw)

speaking of specialist, i can only say this to my group : work harder. always sunshine after the rain. :)

seeking piano students i suppose. but i don't know where to start and i (temporarily) refuse to work at Cristofori / Yamaha.. heard they suck out nearly 30% of the original amount paid. ngehhhhh.

happy birthday colin chong pok pok. haha!

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 12:13 PM 」

i just had THE weirdest dream. it involved maria, mingshan, the fantastic 4, my cousin's house and moi.. it's so weird.

i can't say it here. it's mighty unflam and fembarrassing. LOL.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 12:46 PM 」

thank God, the crush is gone. I shan't do anything about it.

*

had my dosage of elf, we have not spent time much tgt (ironically since i've known her for a decade exactly) but yeah, it was great, we've been neglecting each other what with both our personal lives having a dramatic turn so yeah. lub chew elion wong fann wong elin lian hamtaro monster. <3


*

yesterday was weird, i was along Clarke Quay area around 10:30pm.. and then these female trio + one guy (whom looked damn straight fyi) kept on staring at me. even as i crossed the road to be on the same side as them ( i needed to take the bus 54 on that side)

suddenly (as i was being all glam with my puma tee, levis jeans, nike bag, converse shoes, megawatt pout [i'm kidding for this one], ipod earphones) the prettiest of the bunch approached me

girl : *taps shoulder*
me : *turns around*
girl : . . . . . (couldn't hear)
me : *takes off earphone*
girl : can i kiss you?
me : *blinks* what?
girl : can i kiss you or not?

-

startled, i wanted to ask WHY!? budden, basic instinct told me to just auto reject

-

me : err.. no? *smiles*
girl : *180 degree face change* *turns around* WEI! he say NO wor! *runs back to group*

-

then as i was on the bus , i noticed her holding hands with the dude.

so i suppose. this was a dare.. or "she wanted to do something kinky" (SHAUN CHRISTOPHER TEO,2006) or she just wanted me to be involved in a fight with her potentially-jealous boyfriend.

haa. thank God.

eitherway, i cant help but wonder whether i'm that good looking or it's just a dare.

for modesty and humility, i choose the latter.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 10:31 PM 」

let this crush be gone. it isn't good nor is it going anywhere.

i hate things without a goal.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 1:56 PM 」

i can't believe i am getting so hung up over you when nothing's even confirmed.

conversations aren't going anywhere, it's all just air talk. nothing substantial. proposals are turned down, appointments are pushed far away.

and i feel so damn shitty right now. this is freaking depressing.

*

before all these happened. I WENT OUT WITH MS DENISE KOK HUI FEN (i think it's huifen)

:))))))))))

been a long time since i've rendezvous with her. spent our evening at marina sq, eating at some nice fish resteraunt near the bridge entrace. $12+ for a good seafood basket. aside from all the oil (AHHH FATS!)

followed by watching MOSAIC at Esplanade by the day. big band was the theme tonight! haha. BLACK CAT BONE! haha. i just love the guitar rifts, the catchy beat and the toe tapping rhythms. the guys voice is orgasmic lar. derived from denise's description.

had some spiritual talks.. being able to be so liberated around her gives me the space i need to breathe.

*

i don't know why i'm so hung up over AWAITING your short messages. i feel like such a floser when i'm all hung up over this.

i needa dance.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 2:13 AM 」

a good.. 11 hours sleep. a bit drowsy still. but all set for church todayy. w00ts.

mEs : easier, FBTK (Flashbang team KING) RULES! eh, next week holidays, CS k.

ming: hahaha. fine, i have 1 problem, but YOU have 2 PROBLEMS. muahaha. think about it ;)

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 2:04 PM 」

spending 12 hours, yes 12 friggin' hours in my living room with mah crew. what with Nationa Treasure, Canadian 2-for-1 pizzas, Cartoon Network and "wad allllll".. we accomplished nearly 70% of the proposal for tomorrow. and right now, i'm slaving away at the laptop, anticipating printing over 80 pages of work to print. ngeh, *pats printer*.



with me lazing around, leslie falling asleep, rachel going on a mad bug-hunting spree with my bug zapper, janice having her "chips" cravings, zul making funny faces and alan desperately trying to round us up.. somehow we're growing closer. facing many problems of course, as a team.



you guys don't know HOW MUCH I WANT TO SLEEP RIGHT NOW. i can feel my skin dehydrating and my muscles loosening right now. lazing around in the living room for 12 hours doing work really makes me want to kill myself. time ta start getting used to this. sharksfinsoup. and tomorrow i'll be gymming after pitch, coming back to school for dramaproj2 viewing, then meeting kb in town, then viewing a house, then going out with jason stefani, then it's a night out with waiyi. woo. happy? :)

gosh, i can hardly keep my eyes open. and it's 0314. i'll probably do everything by 4am.

shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitakemushrooms. sigh. snooze.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 3:08 AM 」

visited the Chinese Heritage Centre with mah crew (leslie,alan,zul,rachel,janice) to pickup some ideas about our specialist project.

it's aiite, i should do an undercover photoshoot there one day (photos aren't airquoteopen ALLOWED airquoteclose in there, tho security is way low). mavis, okay? i want professional portfolio. hehehe. CHEAP.

anyway, i seem to realise i've matured in everyway possible (but i'm not gonna stop there) it's good to grow up. and it's truly true that when you grow you, you become more cynical (don't deny that)

dinner with family was okay i guess, we're slowly building where dad left off. i miss him.

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 12:43 AM 」

i spent the whole day with mummy dear, and apparently, i feel ... quite okay actually (SURPRISINGLY LAR). i seriously thought that it would be totally embarrassing and stuff..

went supermarketing with her, woohoo, free toiletries, darn, she offered free hair dye. I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN IT INSTEAD OF BEING MISTER-GOOD-DYE-2-SHOES.

oh well, easy come easy go. QualityTime's definitely her lovelanguage, shall do so more next time. (((:

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 10:41 PM 」

remember the post about going out with the w328 gals? yeah, after most of them left, me mavis and liling sat down at macs and started messing around with mavis's hair with her comb. and guess wad we had?

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 10:39 PM 」

just went for a QUICK shopping trip with my mum at Isetan.

signs that show her hidden taitai-ness

1) "do you have a new piece?"

and the creme de la creme..

2) "sorry, i only like leather handbags"

i gave her a goldfish look after that last statement. fwoar, her skeletons in her closets are falling out.

*

yesterday was fun, me ming & maria had a ball of a time. The drinks were great, the atmosphere was okay, and it felt like pop culture all over again without the lecturer (and her oversized shirts and her speeches about her beloved dogs)

ming, i hope you score. (((:

maria, GET A PROBLEM.

*

gymming today, suntanning too. ahhh. life is good life is great life is unbelievable. :D

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 3:13 PM 」

Happy?

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 4:52 AM 」

WATCH THIS. THIS IS oh-my-gershwinmusical (which i have not used this term for so long) FUNNY LAR. i laughed till i nearly cried.

that girl with bangs, reminds me of that cutesy-wutesy girl kim(berly?) from kid's central? haha.

and whoa. dance moves.. manifestation sia. Rain would love to have her as his boyfriend. MUAHAHAHA.

which reminds me, Rev Mike Connell coming again. .

***

filmhistory was.. satisfying i guess. Shoulda studied the First lecture slides more, as well as Swedish Cinema.

i can DEFINITELY pass, but now praying for an A grade.

pwease?

「 :x all the boys stomp your feet like this x: 1:40 AM 」